Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Much unhappiness has come into the world because of bewilderment and things left unsaid

What's a girl to do?
No, seriously, what am I supposed to do with this boy?
Love him? Leave him?
I hadn't been feeling well this past weekend and spent most of my days in my bedroom reading books and playing mindless flash games. So much for the "student's life for me." I'm feeling better now, but my medicine dosage got doubled...along with its side effects. Lucky me. Anyway, during my time of social isolation, my dear guy friend goes and does something unspeakable. He bought me Chik-fil-A...without me asking for it or asking if I wanted anything. My own family doesn't do anything like that!
Earlier in the day, I ventured out (idiotically) to get something from the store. I met him outside and showed him a picture of the sign I made that he desperately wanted to see (I'll explain that later on). I felt horrible and excused myself, trying to make a quick getaway before I emptied the contents of my stomach. I made a beeline for my dorm and he escorted me the whole way. He's very persistent like that.
He's also too nice.
When I asked him why he was so nice to me, this is what he said:
"Do I have to have a reason? :)"
Now, what am I supposed to think with an answer like that? One of our mutual friend said that she's pretty sure he's crazy about me, but I can never be sure. He's too much of a mystery to me. Normally, I'm pretty good at reading people and their intentions, but I must admit, this boy has got me stumped.
But then again, I most likely stump him too. I regret to say that sometimes I let my feelings and emotions determine how I act and talk around him. The sign I was mentioning before? Yes, it was for him. He was competing in a race and I made one to tape on my dorm window. It took up the whole window and was very obviously for him.
Sometimes, I feel like he's the world to me and other times it's like "what am I thinking??"
Should I tell him what's on my heart and risk our friendship?
Or should I keep on keeping on and risk losing the best thing I could ever have?
The Land of Confusion is not a very happy place to vacation, needless to say.

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